Recently I was watching Oprah’s Lifeclass. There is always an interesting discussion happening on that show. Oprah has a guest on and they talk about their ideas and viewpoints on life topics. It’s usually someone who has positioned themselves as an expert and has a book to promote. I always find little helpful nuggets from this show. The way they get the audience involved, in studio and through social media, is really cool.

One day in particular, I was watching and Steve Harvey was on. Personally, watching his transformation from a standup comedian to actor and mega entreprenuer has been amazing. I can usually take something from his thoughts and advice. This day was no different. He was talking about his new book “Think Like A Success”. During his time on the show, he took questions from the audience. One mother asked about her kids. Her children are all adults ranging in age from their mid-20s to 30 years old. She was still supporting all of them financially in some way. This “support” was putting a strain on her relationship with her husband. She pretty much wanted Steve to tell her she was right for taking care of her “babies”, as she called them. Oprah and Steve reminded her that her children were no longer babies but instead had babies of their own.

Steve told her that he and his wife regularly say these three words to their kids:

As soon as he said the words, “Your wings work!”, I smiled. I think that’s perfection. For our kids, we want to give them the world. The issue with the woman on the show was knowing when to pull the plug. We can’t hold them so tight that we break their wings. At some point, we have to let them test those wings and just be there for the shifts in the wind that knock them off their path.

The truth is,we all need to know that we are fully capable of the life we want. We could all use a reminder here and there to keep flapping. Sometimes we don’t use our wings at all and wonder why we’re not moving. If a bird attempts to leave the nest without attempting to fly, you’ll find it still near that tree. The bird will either be at the foot of the tree injured and upset with his position in life or dead because of his lack of effort. The same is true of our dreams. If we don’t try our dreams will be stuck. They’ll remain a dream, but a dormant one.

The other alternative is they could wither and disappear because we gave them no effort. The solution is to START FLAPPING! You may not immediately soar out of the nest but you’ll be moving. You’ll begin to soar in due time. Promise!