life

It’s All in How You See it…

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**I have to thank you ALL for last week’s post! I shared and you gave it right back. It is a pleasure getting to know you! That has to be my favorite post so far! On to today’s post! 🙂 **

Since the passing of Dr. Maya Angelou, her quotes have been posted everywhere. From Twitter to Facebook, my newsfeed and timeline has been filled with everyone’s favorite quotable from her. Like everyone else, I definitely have my favorites. There are actually too many to list here. I came across this one a couple of days ago. I’m not sure I’d heard anyone mention it before.

be prepared

It sounds great! I think I immediately re-tweeted, liked it and copied it to encourage myself later. It was just the thing I needed to keep me motivated that everything I wanted was mine. I only needed to ask. Whoot whoot!

I took another look at the quote though. When looking at it again, I saw it differently. I saw the work behind this quote that I didn’t see the first time *tire screech*.  The thing is, I took this and ran with at first. It’s easy to just see the surface of it. We ask for what we want and just wait. Boom! That thing I asked for appears. Nice! But I couldn’t stop there. Oh no! I couldn’t let it be pretty and magical. I had to take it a step further. Ugh!

When I looked at it again, the quote had a different meaning.  My guess is the the intent of this quote is to remind us to do the work.

This spoke to me so much as a mama! I have a million things I want to do and pursue. It seems like having babies only made that number multiply. This quote is a reminder to me. The life I want, the passion in my belly and the dream I can’t shake – they take work!  <– {tweet this} Once I’ve done the work though, it’s as simple as making the request and it’s mine. It’s that whole idea of luck. It’s really preparation and opportunity meeting, right? Not exactly hocus pocus, but still so worth it!

Had you heard this quote before? What passion are you working on?

It took extreme pain but, lesson learned

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A week ago, I had two wisdom teeth removed. I had it done on a Friday and figured I’d rest over the weekend and be better by the time my husband went back to work on Monday. Well, it didn’t go as planned. The dentist had to crack my bone to get one of my teeth out and that made my healing torture! I’m still healing.

This experience has taught me that I need to know when to give myself a break. With my jaw throbbing, my teeth feeling like they were shaking in my head, I was still trying to work. At night, I would sit at this laptop frustrated with myself that I couldn’t focus. I wanted so badly to stay on top of the schedule I’d set for myself. Really, I was crazy! It took a friend to remind me to take it easy on myself. I needed to rest. Working was only making me feel worse. I couldn’t be so focused on creating my future and ignoring my present pain.

iPhone May dump 147Sometimes we have to know when to say when. I wasn’t doing that. My body forced me to check myself. I think it’s common among women, especially moms. We push forward hard while downplaying what may be going on with us. I was busy making my kids a priority. I was doing drop-off,  pick-up, packing lunches, play dates and mommy and me classes while being in extreme pain. My kids got what they always get from me. I did have a day or two in there where they watched more TV than they should have. I was wiped out and couldn’t do more in that moment. I think that’s the day it started sinking in for me that my balance was thrown off. I forgot about putting the oxygen mask on myself first. I made sure the kids were good but I was struggling. I had nothing left to give when it was time for me to work.

I decided to stop trying. I had to give myself some grace and just shut this computer off. Instead of trying to write posts and finish books and structure marketing plans – I took my sick behind to bed! It’s so simple but it took extreme pain for me to see it. Taking the pressure off of myself to be superwoman was freeing. I so believe in taking a step closer to your dream everyday. I keep that firmly in the front of my mind. So much so, that I have a hard time taking a day off of dream building.

Here’s the deal, my dreams don’t work without me. I’ve learned to do as much dream building as self loving. One without the other doesn’t work.

I’ll be getting back to me soon enough. I’ll just keep this in my back pocket as a lesson learned.

How do you balance taking care of yourself with taking care of everyone else?

I Almost Said No

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I almost said no. It was Mother’s Day weekend. It started off easy enough. There were brunch reservations. Mimosas were had. Then my husband asked me what else I wanted to do. I was sleepy. I wanted to stay home and take a much needed nap. Instead, I opted to let him surprise me.

yesHe loaded the kids in the car and promised me I could sleep on the way to wherever we were going. I guess that should have been my first hint. We took a drive. I like to think of it as a mystery drive. We live in the Los Angeles area and we drove up the coast.  We cruised around Malibu with the ocean as far as you can see. As we drove further we were surrounded by mountains. There were animals grazing on the side of the mountain, there were rabbits happily hopping along. We eventually drove through Oxnard and saw lots of farm land with markets along the sides of the road. Our kids were getting a kick out of it all. They were really fascinated with the animals. My son wanted to know more about how a farm works. We took some time to take the scenic route and eventually got to the highway entrance. The signs were pointed south back to Los Angeles and north to Ojai. I assumed my husband would head back home. Instead he took the Ojai exit! Our adventure was going to continue!

ojai welcomeWe checked out the city a bit. After a while we found a family friendly restaurant for dinner. It was great to go take this impromptu trip with the kids. I always love experiencing things through them. One thing is for sure, my son is not a fan of road trips. He hasn’t been on a road trip in about two years. He kept asking my husband when he was going to  park the car!

I’m happy I didn’t take that nap. Being open to whatever and having a why not attitude ended up being a wonderful surprise. I’m learning to do that more and more. It’s proving to be a great way to let new experiences happen.

What have you just said yes to lately?

Putting the Pieces Together – Guilt Free

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There is a lot I want out of this life. A lot. As I work to put the pieces together, I sometimes give myself a hard time about what I’m able to do. Sure, being a mom of two kids and a wife to my honey makes things all kinds of challenging. The kids require and are totally entitled to my full attention. They’re young (4 and nearly 2) and love their mommy time! I find ways to balance my snuggles with them and my time on this laptop. It’s a dance. What I know though is if mama is happy, my babies will be happy. That keeps me going toward all the things that help my happy.

There are several things in the works but when I can’t get them done as fast as I would like, I tend to be really hard on myself. I’m learning to give myself a break. I can feel good about doing what I can do, when I can do it. It’s no secret that I can’t go after my dreams the same way I could when I was single. That doesn’t mean I can’t go after them though. Honestly, the single version of me had completely different dreams anyway. The single version of me was younger with more energy too! LOL!

The only personI just have to go about my dreams and passions in a different way, at a different pace. I’m cool with that.  To get things done, I make a small list for the day.When I say small, I’m talking one or two things to accomplish once the kids go to bed. Once I get those things done, I feel like I’ve been successful. If I do more than what’s on that list – cupcakes for everyone! Whoot whoot! I don’t overcrowd my list with so many things that I make my success seem impossible. I like a challenge, but I’m not a fan of self sabotage!. That’s not fair to me. I always have to be fair to me, right?

That’s how I carve out time for my dream building. How about you? Am I the only one guilty of being WAY too hard on myself?

You only THINK you can’t

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What is it you think you CAN’T do? Is there some idea, some nagging thoughts you’ve been talking yourself out of? That thing that keeps coming back and keeps being put off… yeah, you should probably do something about that. If your DREAMS

We all have our reasons for why we can’t do whatever it is we really want to do. It’s like the more we want it, the more reasons we have for why we can’t do it. Isn’t it crazy how that happens? I am definitely guilty of that. In the last few years I’ve changed that. I’ve been more about going for it! It’s the whole idea of knowing that all we really have is right here and right now so putting thing off for someday really doesn’t make sense. I had to learn this hard truth:

There are 7Can you say OUCH!?!?

Well, no matter your reason for talking yourself out of “it”. Whatever “it” is. Let these fun facts give you a nudge in a right direction. Know that what you want – is totally possible!

  • Beethoven’s music teacher once said of him, “As a composer, he is hopeless”.
  • Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team.
  • Walt Disney was fired from a newspaper because he “lacked imagination, and had no good ideas”.
  • Thomas Edison’s teacher told him he was too stupid to learn anything. Later, he tried 1,600 different materials before settling on carbon as the filament for the electric light bulb.

Seriously, anything is possible!

Wanna Feel Good? Start Here…

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When it comes to feeling good, we all want piece of that! While I am a firm believer in going after your dreams, I know that isn’t always easy. Sometimes we don’t go after what we want because we don’t feel like we’re worth it or we just don’t feel good. I think it’s important to work on ourselves from the inside out. Before we can take that first full step toward something we really want, sometimes we need to stand still.

Going for your dreams really means that you’ve decided to do something for you. You’ve decided to listen to that small voice and make your unique contribution to the world. Before your journey onto doing that BIG thing for you, try doing a few small things. It will get your mind in the right spot and get you ready to make your move toward the big thing.

Consider this your invitation to FEEL GOOD!  Here are a few suggestions to get your feel good mojo moving:

Take a drive… Crank your favorite song and sing along – LOUD!

This one works for me EVERY TIME!

 

Go for a walk…Notice all the little things. I bet you’ll find some inspiration.

Try something new with your hair… A new outlook sometimes starts with a new look.

new hairSelf care anyone… How about getting a mani or pedi? Letting someone take care of you encourages you to keep it up and take better care of you too.

Put on something that makes you feel good… That could be a favorite blouse, dress or  jeans. Ahem,  it could also be what you put on underneath it all.  Whatever makes you feel good, ROCK it! You’ll feel good and the reason why can be your little secret.

What gives you an instant shot of feel good?

Dusting off the To-Do List

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Spring is FINALLY here! I know so many people have been looking forward to the warmer weather (I’m looking at you east coast). Here in L.A., it’s been Spring-like for a while but I’m still super excited about the change in seasons. Longer days, more time out enjoying the city with the family and the clothes! I’m a sucker for warm weather fashion. There’s something about lighter fabrics, strappy sandals and sundresses. That just may be my idea of heaven.

Spring-Is-The-Time-Of-Plans-And-ProjectsI see Spring as a bit of a fresh start. It like New Year 2.0. There’s all of this energy and excitement  for what’s to come. From the anticipation of Summer to Spring blooms, it’s like we all find something to look forward to again. Even if those New Year’s resolutions are now collecting a bit of dust, Spring gives us the nod to sweep off the dust and start again. Personally, I think we’d all get more done and stick to our resolutions if the new year started in Spring or Summer anyway, right?  The grey days of Winter can make it hard to stay committed to anything but comfort food. LOL!

not salmonFor this faux New Year, I’m going to take the opportunity to finish a guide I’ve been writing. It’s all about taking care of the dreamer’s inside us as mother’s! I’ll keep you posted on that one! Do you make any fresh starts during Spring? How about taking a minute to make some promises to yourself. Let the warmer weather be your motivation to keep them!

 

Dream Now, Live Later?

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On a recent trip to Target (seriously, I spend WAY too much time there), I stopped by the cards section and noticed a card about living the life you deserve. I was all offended. Yeah, the idea of it all was nice but this card was in the retirement section.

retirement ecard

It made me think about the way things usually go. People work all of their lives toward that pie in the sky called retirement. That’s supposed to be when you are really able to live and enjoy life. It seems to me that doesn’t work. If we wait until retirement to enjoy life, we’ve already missed so much. For my generation, retirement seems SO far away. We are going to need millions to be able to live comfortably. Some people fully expect to work until they are 70 years old.

Yes, at 70 years old is when you can begin to enjoy and life the life of your dreams. For most people, 70 years old finds them tired and many have health issues. How much energy do you really have at that point to travel, pursue your passions and “enjoy life”? Yes, that card had ALL of this racing through my head. It seemed to suggest a “dream now, live later” life. I am fully on board with a “dream NOW and do it NOW” way of life. (tweet this) I have all of these ideas and desires for my life NOW. I can’t get to every single thing right now but I’m determined to do as much as I can.

By the time I’m 70 I want to be still enjoying my life but I really want to be at a point where I’m not chasing myself and trying to do things that I’ve wanted to do my whole life. I’d rather that time be spent still pursuing and dreaming but also doing a great deal of reminiscing about all of the dreams I’d made a reality. That’s my goal. What’s something that you’ve put off to do later that you could do right now?

Fall Madly in love with YOU

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Dont-forget-to-fall-in-loveHow much do you love you? Is it off the charts love? Whatever the case, we could all use a little more love – from ourselves! Here are my top four ways to fall so madly in love with YOU!

  • comparison-quote-450x434
  • Stop comparing yourself to others. You are fabulous just the way you are. There’s no reason to compare your short story to someone else’s novel. You have no idea how long it took to get that novel picture perfect and publisher ready. Give yourself a break and focus on your journey. It’s going to turn out as it should.
  • Let yourself off the hook. So you didn’t work out today.  What did you do? Focus on the things you do right instead of the areas where you think you’ve failed. That doesn’t mean to ignore the areas that need a little improvement. Don’t make your failures your focus. If you give more energy to the things you do well, other things will begin to add themselves to that list.
  • Spend some time with yourself. Take a little time to get to know you, like really know you. Fall in love with yourself. The more you love on you, the better you’ll be to Y-O-U!
  • You have dreams that are unique to only you. That is pretty freaking awesome! Even if your dreams seem like they are someone else’s life, you’re a different person so that dream would look totally different on you! Go for it!

If The World Wrote You A Letter

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“We’re all desperately waiting for you to just do it.  What are you waiting for?

Signed,

The World

Is that the kind of sign we need to get things moving? Does the world really  need to cry out for us to set out on the path of turning dreams into reality? The truth is, the world really is waiting for you to just do it – whatever “it” is. Whatever it is you want to offer the world, there is someone out here waiting for it. What you have to offer could change. their. life. Seriously, think about that. If you decide that it’s too much and you can’t get to it or it’s too hard you know what happens? A lot of somebodies miss out on something pretty special. Think about the people who have changed your life with their gift. It could be a pastor, a singer, a teacher or Oprah! If they hadn’t followed their heart and their passion, you would have missed out. Make sense?

waitingEvery year, so many of us make resolutions, intentions and commitments to rock out life in some way or another. We start off strong. Then around March we start to slow down. Our burning ambitions become a slightly visible flame. So what happened? Over the years, I have been able to point the finger at a few things. Sometimes it’s as simple as life. It gets hectic, it gets complicated, it changes before we are ready to make the adjustment and we have to roll with it. So, our original demands of ourselves become back burner suggestions at best. It happens. If you stop altogether now, you’ll be that much further behind and probably totally give up eventually. Don’t do it!

Consider this your permission slip to take those goals and dreams off the back burner and make them a priority again. Maybe you can’t take on the whole enchilada but how about one small piece of it? Everything is easier to chew in bite sized pieces, right?

Here’s what that looks like for me. Instead of taking on the task of writing a whole new book right now, I’ve decided to work on a few small things at a time. I’m still keeping the writing mojo going but giving the time to my family that they need too. It’s a win-win. I do what I love and my family still gets what they need.

So tell me, how can you take bite sized pieces toward your dreams, goals right now?