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A Weekend With Oprah…

November 18, 2014 by cam

“We are here to turn up the volume on your life.” – Oprah Winfrey

The volume on my life has been cranked – way up!

With anticipation running through me, I drove to San Jose this weekend. I was excited for a few reasons. I had been invited to cover Oprah’s Life You Want Weekend AND I was going to get some alone time. I looked forward to loads of inspiration, resting and getting work done. The only thing I managed to accomplish was being supremely inspired! Once I hit the road to come back home on Sunday, I felt nothing short of transformed.

With more than 10,000 people in an arena, the whole event managed to feel like an intimate gathering. A gathering of people who shared one goal – holding the pencil that writes our life stories. The energy was electric. There were dance parties like this all weekend.

It was amazing to be around so many people who all greeted each other with smiles and hugs. So what that we’d all just met. It was like some alternate universe that we all wished flowed from the arena and permeated our cities.

I had many “aha moments” and just moments of confirmation.

Oprah started things off on Friday night by sharing her life story. There were many things I hadn’t heard before and it was awesome to get those details straight from the source. Her message was looking for the thread that connects the dots of your life.

“The thread is your spirit seeking expression. Your thread is that which connects the dots and experiences of your life and allows you to become who you were meant to be. Everybody has their own thread. What is your thread? What’s your purpose? Why are you here? What is that which connects the dots of your life? Your job is to pay attention to whatever that is.”

As she spoke, all around me I saw tears, hands were raised in affirmation and one woman even let out a shout. You know the kind that only happen in church. It was definitely a spiritual experience.

On Saturday, class was in session. We were all handed workbooks as we walked in. It was clear, this is where the real work was going to begin.

Deepak Chopra was the first to take the stage. He talked a lot about spirituality and how to find that connection for yourself. “Religion,” he said, “is believing in someone else’s experience. Spirituality is believing in your own. If someone’s pointing at the moon, you should be looking at the moon, not worshiping the person’s finger.” His talk led to him leading us in meditation. I had never meditated before. It was a great experience for me. I plan on incorporating it into my life.

Elizabeth Gilbert of “Eat, Pray, Love”was up next and she talked about going on a quest of self-discovery. She talked about dreams and knowing when it’s time to change your life. We were reminded that change isn’t painless but it’s so necessary!

Pastor Rob Bell spoke of living RIGHT NOW. He used the example of saving the good china for special occasions when none of us really know if we’re going to be here tomorrow let alone for that special occasion. All we really have is right now. Use the china now, live the life you want now.

Once Iyanla Vanzant took her turn we were all worked up, on fire and brimming with excitement. She definitely kept it going. Her whole talk was about life and the ups and downs that come with it. She asked that we all remember that life really is on our side. Those things we go through are for a reason. There are lessons in all of it to get us to the next level. We have the choice of repeating those lessons or learning and growing from them to move toward the life we want.

The common them for all that spoke is that they had been knocked down by life. They had experienced real stuff and were able to bounce back to gain the life they wanted. Once they day was over we were all emotionally drained and full at the same time. I exchanged information with all the people that sat near me.

Rrachelle , moi + Stephanie

A few of us even made a pact to not lose what we’d gained that weekend. We have promised to hold each other accountable to going, full force after the life it is that we want. The first step, is embracing the life you already have.

*Oprah photos Courtesy of Harpo, Inc. / George Burns

When it’s Oprah, Just Hit SUBMIT

November 11, 2014 by cam

You ever have an opportunity to do something really good? It’s definitely a life changing opportunity but the questions in your head start swirling. Before you know it, you’ve talked yourself out of the opportunity. You’ve built a pretty convincing case against yourself as to why you won’t get it.

That was almost me a few weeks ago. When I first heard about Oprah’s Life You Want Weekend, I knew I wanted to be a part of it. I immediately went online to see where the tour was going. I thought for sure, it would be making it’s way to L.A. To my surprise, there were no stops in or around L.A. The closest stop was going to be in San Jose. I gave it a lot of thought and figured I’d see how I could make that happen. It can be pretty hard for me to get away during the week because we don’t have back up child care for our children.

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Then, I saw a thread in a Facebook group I’m in. There was talk of opportunities being available for the media. Even though I’ve been a part of the media for nearly 20 years now, I questioned myself. I asked myself a million questions and had started to convince myself that I wouldn’t make the cut for media for this event. After staring at the form for a few days, I finally filled it out. I remember the moment I hit “submit”. I was nervous, excited and hopeful. I wondered if there was anything I’d left out that I should have said. Then, I decided to just let it go, say a prayer and know that whatever is meant to be is what will be.

I’m happy to say that I was approved! I’ll be attending the Life You Want tour stop in San Jose! I am equal parts excited and hopeful! The whole message of the tour is the message I try to drive home in this space. We are all worthy of the life we want. Even as moms – especially as moms! I say especially not because we’re entitled as moms to be any happier than anyone else. As moms though it can be tougher to pursue those things that bring you the life you want. I am going to soak up the knowledge and I’ll be bringing it right back here to you!

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The next time you get that feeling of , “am I ready?”, “can I do this?”, hit “submit”! Submit yourself, submit to the process and be open to the life you want!

Never Too Late

November 4, 2014 by cam

My whole “mama motivator” moniker was started because I have encountered far too many moms who felt like it was too late to do certain things that might bring them some happiness. I talked too many moms who felt like everything about them had to hit the back burner because their name changed to mama. Simply put, my message is it’s not too late. It never is. Let this man be your inspiration…

It’s never to late for what, you ask? I have a small list. Feel free to add to it.

It’s Never Too Late…

to start over – were you working on something and life got in the way so you put it down. Now is a good time to pick it back up.

to chase your dreams – always wanted to write a book? How about starting the outline today?

to change your ways – fed up with your fitness. Go for a walk, a good one that gets your heart moving. All it takes is one step.

to be positive – what you focus on grows. If you focus on the sucky stuff, that’s all you’ll see. Try to look for the positive in every situation and you’ll start to notice the positive more than the negative – guaranteed.

to learn something new – always wanted to learn to paint. Take a class. Or break the ice by taking a paint and sip class. It’s fun and you’ll get your artist juices flowing.

to be inspired – inspiration really is everywhere. We just have to look for it. I’m most inspired by my kids. There’s something about the innocence they bring to everything that keeps me inspired.

Any thing you’d like to add? It’s never too late to…

These Three Words – Game Changer

October 7, 2014 by cam

Recently I was watching Oprah’s Lifeclass. There is always an interesting discussion happening on that show. Oprah has a guest on and they talk about their ideas and viewpoints on life topics. It’s usually someone who has positioned themselves as an expert and has a book to promote. I always find little helpful nuggets from this show. The way they get the audience involved, in studio and through social media, is really cool.

One day in particular, I was watching and Steve Harvey was on. Personally, watching his transformation from a standup comedian to actor and mega entreprenuer has been amazing. I can usually take something from his thoughts and advice. This day was no different. He was talking about his new book “Think Like A Success”. During his time on the show, he took questions from the audience. One mother asked about her kids. Her children are all adults ranging in age from their mid-20s to 30 years old. She was still supporting all of them financially in some way. This “support” was putting a strain on her relationship with her husband. She pretty much wanted Steve to tell her she was right for taking care of her “babies”, as she called them. Oprah and Steve reminded her that her children were no longer babies but instead had babies of their own.

Steve told her that he and his wife regularly say these three words to their kids:

As soon as he said the words, “Your wings work!”, I smiled. I think that’s perfection. For our kids, we want to give them the world. The issue with the woman on the show was knowing when to pull the plug. We can’t hold them so tight that we break their wings. At some point, we have to let them test those wings and just be there for the shifts in the wind that knock them off their path.

The truth is,we all need to know that we are fully capable of the life we want. We could all use a reminder here and there to keep flapping. Sometimes we don’t use our wings at all and wonder why we’re not moving. If a bird attempts to leave the nest without attempting to fly, you’ll find it still near that tree. The bird will either be at the foot of the tree injured and upset with his position in life or dead because of his lack of effort. The same is true of our dreams. If we don’t try our dreams will be stuck. They’ll remain a dream, but a dormant one.

The other alternative is they could wither and disappear because we gave them no effort. The solution is to START FLAPPING! You may not immediately soar out of the nest but you’ll be moving. You’ll begin to soar in due time. Promise!

Living the Dream?

August 19, 2014 by cam

I was sold. Hook line and sinker. I wanted it all. I wanted the house, the car, the husband, the kids, the career and all of the “things” that say I’m rocking this life thing. I got it all sewn up! There’s this idea that if you drive a certain car, wear particular clothes and live in certain neighborhood that you are on top of the world. That’s the story. The American Dream.

You go to college. You decide at 18years old what you’d like to do for the rest of your life and you set off on the path of “living the dream”. I was so there. I had my plan carved out and I made it! I was living my American dream. After college, I started working in media right a way. I worked my way from editorial assistant for a newspaper to a writer and producer for network television. I got married, we got a dog, a house and two children. It felt good to be able to check life goals off the imaginary life list. What didn’t feel good was the amount of hours needed to make the dream work. What didn’t feel good was never feeling like we had enough time with our kids. I started to realize the American dream was all about “things”. I thought about what that really meant for me.

There’s this saying that you never see a U-haul behind a Hearst because you can’t take any of this stuff with you. I thought about that. I thought about a minister once saying that we buy things we don’t need, with money we don’t have, to impress people we don’t like. Ouch! Hmmm… I thought about what will matter most to me at the end of the day, my family or my stuff. I had to re-evaluate what giving my all looked like for me.

While I was still producing television, I began having these ideas of the life I NOW wanted. I kept a notebook to jot them down. Now that I had that jigsaw laid out it was time to figure out how I was going to put that puzzle together. I started jotting down ideas. I talked to my husband to pick his brain. We were on the same page, thankfully. We are more concerned with experiences rather than things. We started talking things out to figure out how we could make our life simpler, easier. Being in the grind here in L.A. is a beast. We are on a mission to tame the beast in a way that works for our family.

Part of that is making the best of our time with our kids creating memories and experiences. It’s led to me craving a simpler life. I never knew how much I loved the outdoors until I stopped to see it though the eyes of my babies. Playing at a water table really can be fun and therapeutic. The kids have fun and I let the water relax me a bit. This attitude has also extended to how I want our home set up. I’ve been on a mission to get rid of things that aren’t needed. I have bagging up things left and right. I have re-designed rooms in my head so that things just feel better. A while ago I read something about clearing space in your home as it relates to making space for other (non-material) things to come into your life. I’m all about that! I can’t say that I won’t drool over the latest “it” bag or that I will completely abandon my closet full of shoes. I like baby steps, y’all. What I will say, is that I’ll be making progress bit by bit to make my life more of MY dream and less of the American dream. With the traditional dream, there is always more to get. With my dream, I focus on what I already have. Feels better already.

A labor of LOVE + I named her Get it, Mama!

August 5, 2014 by cam

What’s the biggest change that happens after becoming a mama? I don’t know that I could pick just one. There’s the whole thing with exhaustion. That’s real! I remember wondering if I would EVER get sleep again. With my first child, I remember feeling like people forgot about me. Everybody wanted to talk to me but they only wanted to talk about my baby. I get it though. He was all I wanted to talk about too. 🙂

That’s kind of where it started though. People made it clear to me that my life was changing and my dreams needed to take a backseat – indefinitely. They weren’t trying to be Debbie Downer’s. They meant it in the best way possible. I’m all about my life changing. I want to be a hands-on, engaging, snuggle party-having mom. I good with making the sacrifices that come with that. I embrace it. So much so, that I had another baby.

The thing I couldn’t accept is my dreams taking an indefinite backseat. My thinking is that my dreams are still valid post-baby. They don’t suddenly expire because I have a little person on my hip. What does change is the time I have to pursue those dreams. My priority is making sure my babies are getting all they need even while I make sure I’m following my heart and pursuing things that I love. It’s not easy, for sure. It can be done though.

I should say here that I’m a “prove you wrong” type of girl. If you tell me I can’t do something, I’ll make it my mission to find a way to do it. I took this same attitude when it came to following some of my dreams after my babies made their way into the world. I’ve accomplished a few things and I have a long list of things I want to do still. The way that I see it, my kids will benefit from seeing me make my dreams a reality. I bet they’ll also be inspired to do the same. I call that WINNING!

Since becoming a mom, I have more friends who are moms as well. A hot topic seems to be all of the things we want to do – one day. Write a book, start a business, launch a blog, etc. From all of our conversations, this guide was born. Meet Get it, Mama! It’s a guide I’ve been working on for what seems like forever. I’m talking practical tips for us to do more of what makes us happy all while rocking our number ONE gig!

I’d love for you to check out my labor of love, it’s FREE! Just click the image below. 🙂

Tell me, what do you struggle with when it comes to balancing babies and pursuing your passions/dreams?

It’s All in How You See it…

June 3, 2014 by cam

**I have to thank you ALL for last week’s post! I shared and you gave it right back. It is a pleasure getting to know you! That has to be my favorite post so far! On to today’s post! 🙂 **

Since the passing of Dr. Maya Angelou, her quotes have been posted everywhere. From Twitter to Facebook, my newsfeed and timeline has been filled with everyone’s favorite quotable from her. Like everyone else, I definitely have my favorites. There are actually too many to list here. I came across this one a couple of days ago. I’m not sure I’d heard anyone mention it before.

It sounds great! I think I immediately re-tweeted, liked it and copied it to encourage myself later. It was just the thing I needed to keep me motivated that everything I wanted was mine. I only needed to ask. Whoot whoot!

I took another look at the quote though. When looking at it again, I saw it differently. I saw the work behind this quote that I didn’t see the first time *tire screech*. The thing is, I took this and ran with at first. It’s easy to just see the surface of it. We ask for what we want and just wait. Boom! That thing I asked for appears. Nice! But I couldn’t stop there. Oh no! I couldn’t let it be pretty and magical. I had to take it a step further. Ugh!

When I looked at it again, the quote had a different meaning. My guess is the the intent of this quote is to remind us to do the work.

This spoke to me so much as a mama! I have a million things I want to do and pursue. It seems like having babies only made that number multiply. This quote is a reminder to me. The life I want, the passion in my belly and the dream I can’t shake – they take work! <– {tweet this} Once I’ve done the work though, it’s as simple as making the request and it’s mine. It’s that whole idea of luck. It’s really preparation and opportunity meeting, right? Not exactly hocus pocus, but still so worth it!

Had you heard this quote before? What passion are you working on?

It took extreme pain but, lesson learned

May 20, 2014 by cam

A week ago, I had two wisdom teeth removed. I had it done on a Friday and figured I’d rest over the weekend and be better by the time my husband went back to work on Monday. Well, it didn’t go as planned. The dentist had to crack my bone to get one of my teeth out and that made my healing torture! I’m still healing.

This experience has taught me that I need to know when to give myself a break. With my jaw throbbing, my teeth feeling like they were shaking in my head, I was still trying to work. At night, I would sit at this laptop frustrated with myself that I couldn’t focus. I wanted so badly to stay on top of the schedule I’d set for myself. Really, I was crazy! It took a friend to remind me to take it easy on myself. I needed to rest. Working was only making me feel worse. I couldn’t be so focused on creating my future and ignoring my present pain.

Sometimes we have to know when to say when. I wasn’t doing that. My body forced me to check myself. I think it’s common among women, especially moms. We push forward hard while downplaying what may be going on with us. I was busy making my kids a priority. I was doing drop-off, pick-up, packing lunches, play dates and mommy and me classes while being in extreme pain. My kids got what they always get from me. I did have a day or two in there where they watched more TV than they should have. I was wiped out and couldn’t do more in that moment. I think that’s the day it started sinking in for me that my balance was thrown off. I forgot about putting the oxygen mask on myself first. I made sure the kids were good but I was struggling. I had nothing left to give when it was time for me to work.

I decided to stop trying. I had to give myself some grace and just shut this computer off. Instead of trying to write posts and finish books and structure marketing plans – I took my sick behind to bed! It’s so simple but it took extreme pain for me to see it. Taking the pressure off of myself to be superwoman was freeing. I so believe in taking a step closer to your dream everyday. I keep that firmly in the front of my mind. So much so, that I have a hard time taking a day off of dream building.

Here’s the deal, my dreams don’t work without me. I’ve learned to do as much dream building as self loving. One without the other doesn’t work.

I’ll be getting back to me soon enough. I’ll just keep this in my back pocket as a lesson learned.

How do you balance taking care of yourself with taking care of everyone else?

And then I said “Why Not?”

April 22, 2014 by cam

It took becoming a mom for me to greet life with a “why not?”.

My son just does stuff. He thinks it and he does it. He is just completely open to life. The kid has never met a stranger (we’re working on that). He walks into a room full of kids and his response is “hey guys!”. He’s always open to new people and new experiences. I love that about him. I love that I have become more like him. Isn’t it funny that I became more like him? I admire his open approach to life. I know that it’s because everything is new to him. He’s only four and so much of life is a mystery to him. He is not afraid of the mystery though. Instead he welcomes it. Isn’t it awesome how kids make you see things differently?

I have to say that since becoming a mother, I have noticed that I’m far more open as well. Whether that means sharing my experiences or speaking up when opportunities are in front of me. I had one of those moments recently. There was a woman I saw on television. Her missions and goals directly lined up with mine. I saw an opportunity to reach out and I did.

In times past, I would have been to shy to reach out – even on line. The mama version of me has an attitude of “why not?” So, I found an email and reached out. It felt so good to hit “send” on that message. It was yet another reminder for me of my growth. Reaching out to her falls right in line with my mission to inspire and motivate moms to find and follow their passions. It felt right. It would be great if a connection is formed because of my willingness to reach out. Even if it leads to nothing at all, it’s a step for me. It doesn’t matter what happens from here. The success for me is in making the move, taking the step.

And that is how I’ll keep working toward making my dreams come true. Whether they be giant steps or baby steps – the thing is, keep moving! And to think all of this new found boldness started because of a little kid – mine.

How have your kids changed you? What have you said “why not” to lately?

Update 4/23/14 12:57pm PST: The woman I sent the email to responded! You’ll be hearing more about her next month! Excited!

Putting the Pieces Together – Guilt Free

April 15, 2014 by cam

There is a lot I want out of this life. A lot. As I work to put the pieces together, I sometimes give myself a hard time about what I’m able to do. Sure, being a mom of two kids and a wife to my honey makes things all kinds of challenging. The kids require and are totally entitled to my full attention. They’re young (4 and nearly 2) and love their mommy time! I find ways to balance my snuggles with them and my time on this laptop. It’s a dance. What I know though is if mama is happy, my babies will be happy. That keeps me going toward all the things that help my happy.

There are several things in the works but when I can’t get them done as fast as I would like, I tend to be really hard on myself. I’m learning to give myself a break. I can feel good about doing what I can do, when I can do it. It’s no secret that I can’t go after my dreams the same way I could when I was single. That doesn’t mean I can’t go after them though. Honestly, the single version of me had completely different dreams anyway. The single version of me was younger with more energy too! LOL!

I just have to go about my dreams and passions in a different way, at a different pace. I’m cool with that. To get things done, I make a small list for the day.When I say small, I’m talking one or two things to accomplish once the kids go to bed. Once I get those things done, I feel like I’ve been successful. If I do more than what’s on that list – cupcakes for everyone! Whoot whoot! I don’t overcrowd my list with so many things that I make my success seem impossible. I like a challenge, but I’m not a fan of self sabotage!. That’s not fair to me. I always have to be fair to me, right?

That’s how I carve out time for my dream building. How about you? Am I the only one guilty of being WAY too hard on myself?